A New Gadget

 

Yesterday a post about limp dicks and today a post about a new gadget meant to treat that wet noodle.

Healthline does product reviews. This one, "Giddy Review: "Does the Giddy Device Work," written by Breanna Mona and medically reviewed by Matt Coward, MD, FACS, is about the new cock ring you may have heard about for treating Erectile Dysfunction (ED). To think I almost deleted the email....

Eddie by Giddy is a new-fangled cock ring, made from silicone.

Unlike the typical cock ring, this one is U-shaped and is held closed with a heavy rubberband.

And, according to users interviewed by Mona, may not be as easy to get on as the normal ring. This one is going to take both hands.

The fact it comes in different girth sizes is a good thing, and the company promises to help any guy "resize" if the original purchase doesn't fit properly. (Though, the website does offer help in sizing.) 

It's an FDA Class II Medical Device, which means it's been reviewed but not tested. You might be tempted to try it. But, at $238.00 for a 2-pack, the price alone may be enough to make you lose your boner.

Especially when you read down the article and find out it will need to be replaced every 2- 3 months. Whereas, a typical silicon or metal cock ring online, or at your neighborhood adult store, may run you $5 - $10 and pretty much last forever.

Additionally, it carries the same caution as any other cock ring which is used at only the base of the shaft.

As opposed to one that encircles both cock and balls.

You should only keep it on for 30 minutes, maximum. If you develop trouble, seek medical attention immediately to have it removed by a doctor.

Depending on the type of ED (yes, there are different types, read the linked article) you have, a cock ring may not even be the right solution for you. 

But everyone understands how important your boners are.

If you need a little lift, you need a little lift.

A Limp Dick

 

Faithful Reader, William, sent a link to an article, which I found both amusing and worth looking into.

Mark Sumner in his Daily Koss article, "Studies show COVID-19 helping to remove Republicans from gene pool in more than one way," should be quite the eye-opener for some men.

It should be self-evident that serious illness is a big boner killer. The cock has always been a great health barometer. With long-haul CV-19 symptoms, one wonders if walking from the bed to the bathroom wears a guy out...

how he could manage to get a boner in the first place.

Even to jack off.

"As Civiqs shows, Republicans are still locked into a vaccine hostile position, with 44% saying they will not take the vaccine. This number has not been dented by the delta variant surge, or by the lukewarm endorsements of the vaccine cautiously mouthed by GOP politicians. It seems that there may be nothing which will change Republicans’ minds and get them to take action that’s not only vital for the nation, but for themselves. We might as well give up and …

Oh, wait a sec … Dear Republican men, COVID-19 makes your dick limp. Please form an orderly line."

While the disinformation mill spews forth on the vaccine causing impotence and infertility, now we know it's actually the disease itself. Dr. Ramasamy was among a team of urologists who discovered not only lower sperm counts in male patients, but severe ED. As in, "no hope except going with an implant" severe.

"The suspected cause here is the same thing that is thought to be behind much of the damage COVID-19 can do to the heart, brain, and other organs—blood clots. Those clots lead to decreased blood flow. Decreased blood flow leads to...."

A limp dick.

Guys, if you're still straddling the fence, if there is no medical reason preventing you from getting the vaccine, remove your crotch from that top rail. It could do serious damage to your balls. Not to mention kill your boners.

Cumpadre

 

As I think back on it, Memory Wank is simply pulling a remembrance from what we used to call the Spank Bank. We'd see something particularly arousing and joke, "Oh that's going into my Spank Bank for later."

The second UWoD from the past week: Cumpadre. A jack off buddy (from 'cum' /'come', meaning 'semen', and 'companion'); a friend that you get together with for sessions of solo or mutual masturbation

Variant of: cumpanion (from 'companion' & 'cum'); jack off buddy & wank bud & JO buddy
Similar to: fuck buddy

Straight dudes have spent way too many years hiding this one in the closet. Coining new terms signals a greater acceptance, a normalization. I think wider acceptance opens things up for them. Not that they didn't join in and enjoy it --- they just didn't feel they could admit it.

Now, maybe it's getting more acceptable to admit.

All those straight, married guys who joined in the barracks circle jerks, all the ones who attended the jack off group meetings no longer have to deny it.

Memory Wank

 

The Urban Word of the Day (UWoD) is rather fun but it's also rather telling. It gives a little snapshot of where societal attitudes are headed. They touched on masturbation twice over the past week. Which points toward a much more overall accepting attitude.

It's the most common sex in the world.

One evening my wife was joining some friends to go to a concert I didn't have any interest in. My wife thought she'd have a little fun at my expense by commenting, "Enjoy your night. But be careful, don't get cum on the walls." Everyone laughed - sort of. One friend shook his head as he headed for the door and responded, "Guys jerk off. It's a fact of life. Get over yourself."

Indeed. She never did mind my "me time." All I ever needed to say was, "I'm going to take a little nap." She knew that meant I was going into the bedroom and jack off. But after our friend made his comment she never made another mention of it. Did he embarrass her? Maybe. I don't know. They left for the concert. And I stripped down to enjoy my evening.

The first UWoD over the past week was "memory wank:" the art of remembering an arousing occurrence or some porn you watched while masturbating, often handy if you have no porn or your [sic] in the shower.

That's another form of fantasizing, which we tend to do anyway when we masturbate. Even if we are watching porn. Because, when we jack off watching porn, we're fantasizing about what's taking place on the screen. Whether as giver or receiver, we place ourselves in the situation imagining it's what we're doing.

My favorite "memory wank" seems to be with my masseur, who always took good care of me because massage always caused a boner.

What's yours?