Monday, August 15, 2011

Oh, Balls!


It’s that time of the month again… Time for our Buddy Ball Check.

Consider this your reminder to either A. Slip under the covers until your nuts are nice and warm and toasty and hanging low, or B. Sit in a tub of nice warm water to lower those balls, or C. Stand in the shower under a spray of hot water until your man-berries drop. Then of course, you need to place each testicle between thumb and forefinger and roll it around looking for any lumps or any spot that may feel more solid than the surrounding tissue.

Pop a little wood while doing that? Okay, go ahead and blow a load while you’re at it – it’s good for the prostate. Are you done? Satisfied? The balls feel good: no lumps, no bumps, and you’ve relieved them of some cargo to lighten their load?

Good. Now, get on the phone, or email, or Facebook, or internet Forum, or whatever means of communication you prefer to use and remind every male in your life (father, sons, brothers, cousins, uncles, colleagues, buddies, roommates) to do that ball check! You may save someone’s life.

Got a special bud and prefer checking each other’s nuts because the check can lead to a little bit of mutual stroking? Go ahead. Uh, uh, uh! Hey! Do that ball check first!

Never checked your balls before, or you forgot how to do it? Here’s a link to a video:


The pretty, young doctor teaches you, and a nice young guy in her office, how to check nuts for cancer; then he demonstrates the self-exam for you.

What are you still doing here on your computer? Well, fine, as long as they’re hanging properly, go ahead – check them while you’re sitting there… Well, go ahead. Git ‘er done! Then you can jerk off to the porn…

2 comments:

Rubio said...

great advice, as always.

whkattk said...

@Rubio - Well, thanks! And I hope you've done your part. ;-)