Morning or Night?

We know the medicinal value of pre-sleep orgasms. "Nature's Ambien" as Arianna Huffington put it in reference to masturbation.

Of course, most men would say any orgasm is a good orgasm.

But, what about first thing in the morning? We men wake (most days) with a good solid boner. Many of us say it's our favorite hard-on of the day. So, taking the time to enjoy it seems a natural step.

Which do you think is better:

Last thing at night?

Or first thing in the morning?

For Best Results

Some interesting - if (at first) confusing - reporting by Dr's Oz and Roizen about the fertility health of balls. Upon a first read, you mistakenly think that noise over 55 decibels (dBs) damages The Boys ability to produce healthy swimmers. They report on an Insurance Industry study (but don't specifically cite it) done on 200,000 men who are exposed to 55 dBs on a regular basis, based on place of residency.

Upon a second read, it becomes clear the problem isn't that your balls go deaf - 

it's messed-up sleep patterns which are the real culprit.

Leading one (well, me, anyway) to believe that anything which keeps us from getting a good night's sleep is detrimental to our man-berries. Anxiety and stress, for instance.

For noise disturbance, the good doctors recommend:

"1. Download a smartphone decibel checker; test nighttime sound levels in your bedroom.

2. Check if digital devices or appliances in your home exceed 55 dBs. If they do, turn them down (or off), or trade them in for quieter models.

3. Install double- or triple-pane windows; seal window frames with stripping. Use double-hung, extra-heavy curtain fabric.

4. Sleep with earplugs. (Discard foam plugs daily, and clean reusable plugs regularly.)"

For stress and anxiety, even Oz and Roizen have prescribed exercise and...a man's favorite stress reducer: Sex. Partnered or alone, it typically takes the mind off other things.

The resultant orgasm will relieve all that tension, enabling you to drift off to Slumberland.

For best results, don't spend time tossing and turning, or grumbling and punching the pillow. Just go right to the solution.

Deal With Them

No eclipse watching for us. Heavy clouds, lots of thunder, a little bit of rain. News reported that the Science Denier in Chief and his wife did begin watching without protective eye wear; it took repeated pleas from staff to alter that. Fake news? Did journalists and their fraudulent networks photoshop the video? No doubt. LOL.

There is no doubt however in the science of cocks. They feel they "misbehave" at inappropriate times; doing things without encouragement or approval.

I asked my surgeon before my muscle biopsy if men get erections when under anesthesia during the surgery. "It's rare, but it can happen." Well, what did I expect? We're asleep. Just like those nighttime boners, it happens.

A post at National Institutes of Health offers surgeons a case file on what to do if an erection poses problems.  I've caught up on I Am Jazz. If you aren't aware, this is a reality show on TLC about a transgender (male to female). One episode had her waking from a surgery, and declaring, "Oh, my God, I've got a boner."

Our cocks are not misbehaving, they are, in fact, doing exactly what they need to to stay healthy. Spontaneous erections happen.

All we men are able to do is deal with them as best we can for the situation in which we find ourselves.

Quite the Pollyanna

Cloudy and rainy here today. No eclipse watching for us.

If you plan to watch - do so with care.

I wonder if the science deniers will challenge this science, and watch without protective eyewear?

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One Faithful Reader warns me that the veracity of the emails from straight guys should be held suspect.

"Regarding the latest email you received about a daughter supposedly catching her dad jacking: I'm beginning to seriously believe that writers such as dad are yanking YOUR chain. Every time I read one of the emails you receive -- and the emails you post always follow the same theme -- I ask myself why they always involve supposedly straight men and why do they always involve children? Either the dads who write to you are men who haven't dealt with their gay or bisexual nature yet OR they're pedophiles relaying a fantasy OR they simply get off on writing jack-off stories and enjoy titillating you and your readers. Why don't such emails ever involve openly gay men jacking off and being "caught" by another? The latest writer even felt the need to assert his "straightness" by ending his comment with the statement that his wife "later gave him a satisfying blow job" or words to that effect. Why? I find such emails highly suspect and I can't help but wonder if others have thought the same as I do. What does the lovely Jean think?"

Well, I admit I can be quite the Pollyanna.

It never crossed my mind that these men were being less than sincere.

Am I burying my cynicism too deep?

What to Say

Here's a new one for you all to chew on. 'Cause I really don't quite know what to say about this....

"I've read your blog for a while now and about how to handle it when a son finds you choking the chicken. I think I could handle that. But, what do you tell a young daughter? The other night when I got home from work I told my wife I needed to lay down and get rid of a massive tension headache. She was supposed to be keeping an eye on the kids. From reading your blog (thank you by the way), I knew jerking off would help me relieve the headache.

I was on the bed with my pants around my ankles and stroking a decent hard-on and hear this little voice ask me what I was doing? How long had she been there? I don't know. I jumped off the bed, trying to stuff my boner back into my pants and yelling for my wife to come and get the kid. Needless to say, it was a pretty tense situation and I was grumpy and grouchy all evening. Well,until she put the kids to bed and gave me a nice long, satisfying blow job.

Seriously, we need to know how to explain this, because even my wife is at a loss for words on this and she's a pretty savvy woman. How do you explain what Daddy was doing?"

B

C

Well, the only thing I can come up with is: This is something older boys - or "big boys" - do. When they don't feel well, it helps them feel better.

2

3

D

4

5

E

F

6

7

Other than that, you've got me. So, folks...

What do you tell a young daughter?