"My wife and I have pretty good sex. My problem comes that after I'm done I don't feel done. I'm still very horny. If I manage to come a second time it's very intense and feels satisfactory. Sometimes she will accomodate me, sometimes not and that's when I take matters into my own hand. Is this normal? What is going on?"
Let me see if I really understand the issue. You engage in sex and you cum but it doesn't leave you feeling fully satisfied. Your horniness ends after a second ejaculation. The second one is always more intense.
The cock is more and more sensitive the closer we get to ejaculation. That sensitivity will linger. That you start again shortly after you cum the first time helps you achieve a higher level of sensitivity, (probably) making your body wind up tighter so that the second ejaculation is more intense than the first. We men are always so eager to get to the finish line whether we're with a partner or jacking off.
Here's a suggestion: Take more time during the first go-round. Don't be in such a hurry to cum. Change positions, change the type of stimulation.
Let the sexual tension build, let your body wind up like the skin of a snare drum before you ram the drumstick. Wait until you feel the tension in your core, when your leg muscles are clenching and you're grabbing the sheets into your fists, then reach for the crescendo. Your ejaculation should be stronger. The volume should be increased. It should take more spasms to release.
The more aroused you get, the more tension builds, the stronger the ejaculation will be.
17 comments:
I am as worried as I am upset: a new week, the fourth, which begins without AOM. Soon a month… that speaks for itself.
Hugs and bisous, my darlings Jean and Pat.
Some people just have a stronger libido and that's perfectly fine IMHO. 👍🏻
Keep doin' you. 🙂 And what could be good in your situation is orgasming as soon as you can, then if you want to orgasm together, your partner can wait for you to get there the 2nd time and then finally climax. 💦
Hope you like the idea! 😉
Fabulous visuals! (Had to steal the last two.)
Well, I would not mind having this partner LOL
But yeah, in cases where the libidos don't match this could be a problem...
XOXO
Yes...BE SURE to take a lot of time and be imaginative and don't forget to play the mental game as well. The mental game can drive you almost insane with anticipation.
In the beginning, I very much enjoyed sex with my wife but somehow it wasn't fantastic.
After we had been married about 4 or 5 years I discovered a marital sex book...don't recall the name....on how to electro-charge your sex life. In a nutshell, it was how both husband and wife would mentally torment each other for the coming romp later that day. Today, I call it MENTAL EDGING for husband and wife.
I'd call her or text her and tell her what I was going to do to her when I got home....and sometimes I'd tell her she could play with herself if she promised not to cum.....stuff like that.
Once, she put a note inside my briefcase right on top when I opened it, that had our home address on it and the note said, "Slab of wet pussy waiting for you. Hurry home. I'm getting desperate."
This goes on and on during the day....the power of suggestion in what is going to happen. It's a mean workout for your brain.
We usually are so worked up by the time our playtime actually starts, that our hands are shaking trying to undress each other.
After a bit of a marathon and holding back till I can't stand it, I'd usually end up with an orgasm that would leave me shattered....I can't think of a better word for it.
Try it....what do you have to lose? Introduce it slowly. It will take a bit of time to get both of you "in tune" with this new approach....but it's worth it! Talk about animalistic sex!!! I find I sleep like a baby afterwards.
Have you explained this to your wife? She may have some very good ideas or reasons. (Just too tired?)
Or give her plenty of good reasons to continue for a second go round.
hugs and bisous.
Very interesting. Probably his first ej. comes too fast!
Why's a straight guy asking questions of a gay blog?
@ Hot Guys - Good suggestion.
@ Six - LOL. I think deep down, we'd all like to do him or be him.
@ Anon - Great suggestion. Really. I've heard of other couples doing this and enjoying the results.
@ Jean - I wonder if they discussed it.... His email made it sound like he thinks he's got some physical issue.
@ Anon, 5:55 =- The blog is not tied or restricted to gay men. It's more about guys keeping their "parts" healthy, and shedding the embarrassment of said "parts." I get a lot of straight married men - and women - reading here. Every once in a while, one will send me a question. I'm well aware that the majority of readers are gay men, but kind of proud of the fact that no specific sexual orientation drives the content.
Do whatever feels best, right?
Hi As always I find your blog and answers informative and interesting.
Don't mean to hijack your blog and post but like you and French Patrick today I am very worried about Phil over at AOM. Can anyone reach out to him personally - text, phone call, visit his house? Thanks.
Wishing everyone well at this terrible milestone of 500,000 and hope you stay safe. Please keep wearing your mask and following the precautions even though it is hard. We can get through this together. Thanks. Andy
how old are they?
how often do they make sex?
Discordant sex drive, totally normal. It's PC to say women are sexually insatiable, but that isn't really true. Every couple goes through this to some extent because your sex drive is in constant flux.
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