Well, Jean's assumption appears to have been pretty much on target. Gay men don't have a problem with a partner masturbating.
"Rather than being upset by one's partner masturbating, especially if he found his partner doing it, he would most probably join in or even fall on his knees and suck him off!!!"
"Seems like years ago that I chatted with a reader who did have an issue with masturbation when he was in relationship - like saving up for his partner - I've never had an issue like that but I'm sure there are those who do - probably not many though."
But, comments from Bretty have some very good information for the man who wrote in:
"HSDD [Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder] has been reclassified and separated by gender now, so HSDD is a diagnosis given to men, and for women is now called Female Sexual Interest/Arousal Disorder. (Had to brush up on "official" diagnostic terms). FSAD is defined as a "lack of, or significantly reduced, sexual interest/arousal", manifesting as at least three of the following symptoms: no or little interest in sexual activity, no or few sexual thoughts, no or few attempts to initiate sexual activity or respond to partner's initiation, no or little sexual pleasure/excitement in 75%-100% of sexual experiences, no or little sexual interest in internal or external erotic stimuli, and no or few genital/nongenital sensations in 75%-100% of sexual experiences.
I'm not fully conversant with this as women don't often seek help for FSAD. I'm a counselor who has training in psychosexual therapy, so it's part of my knowledge base. It's an interesting area.
On the issue of her, and many women's, reaction to the husband masturbating, this is not unusual. Women generally are given different messages about masturbation and some of those messages include it being disgusting or that if your partner is masturbating they're not being satisfied by you, or your partner shouldn't want or need to masturbate whilst in a relationship."
We're all about information here, and, actually, Bretty's comments can help anyone who is facing extreme-libido issues. For the vast majority of people, sex is part of a fulfilling relationship. From a male standpoint, it's also an important health issue. Perhaps, armed with this information, the man who wrote in can move forward.
Masturbation is a very normal, very regular part of a man's sex life. Somehow, that has to become common enough knowledge to put women's minds at ease.
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10 comments:
Thanks for the information on FSAD. I have a friend whose obviously has that. I will share this information with him. FYI I think his wife would react like the lady in question should he masturbate in front of her or even if she knew. I think it is mostly a reaction to feeling on the part of the wife that she is inadequate one perhaps that the husband is somehow unfaithful.
Hope your tests are proving that you can get the new treatments. Keep us posted on your progress.
Men and women are different sexual creatures, that's for sure.
I have always thought of masturbating as a cleaning on the pipes. Hope you had a great weekend. On mine we were each putting together a list for the perfect guest list...and not having met you, you were one of the guys on mine. You'd fit right in with us. Ages 29 -58. We always have a blast. Not to mention there were a lot of walk ins so to speak over the weekend. Jean is right. Gay guys could care less. Their either like oh sorry, continue...or join in.
So pleased that you got such good responses! Thanks for publishing mine! Great selection of "images" as always. I'm getting more and more visits to my blog, but not many comments. I'm having lunch with a great friend. We first met in 1973. He's having heart problems and recently prostate cancer treatment. Given 12 - 15 months left! OH! Yes! Lots of hugs!!! I've scheduled posts for today! More hugs! OH! Like that "shades of brown"!!! Even more hugs!!!
Life is complicated enough. The only way which we seem to know for trying to simplify it, it is a never-ending attempt to rack our brain in vain.
But, on the contrary, what could be simpler, my darlings Jean and Pat, than to wish you a well deserved wondrous day with a lot of bisous.
I support the right to masterbate. :-) Great information featured in this post (not to mention some great visuals!)
Great posts.. . What I've learned is sex is a natural function and if you are healthy you should enjoy it. I will always remember Barbra Streisand's advice for couples was be kind to each other. Kindness goes a long way. Hugs and bisous.
@ mistress - yep. My buddy's play has a line in it, albeit regarding Peyronies Disease: "How can flush out the pipes when you can't get a decent grip on the snake?"
@ MFP - That's called "an exercise in futility." LOL!
@ Jean - Barbra is one of my all-time favorites; maybe THE all-time. Not an album I don't buy, or a film I don't see (or have). I'll attend every concert here - if the budget allows. But, her wisdom should apply to all relationships in one's life.
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