"I have a roommate who is naked all the time. He wanders around with a half hard dick sometimes with a complete boner and doesn't seem to know what a door is for. He showers, pees, sleeps, surfs porn and jerks off and doesn't care who knows or sees him. Sometimes I envy him and wish I could be more like that. TBH there are times I want to join him when he's jerking off to porn but every time I go to say something I freeze up. What's the best way to approach his kind of freedom?"
Your rommie appears to be quite the exhibitionist. Either that, or he's just very comfortable and confident in his body and its functions.
How do you get to be that comfortable in your own skin? Small steps. Can you bring yourself to stay in your underwear? Leave the door open at night when you go to bed despite the erections you know will develop? Leave the door open when you shower despite the boner that might pop up as you wash your cock?
I seriously doubt he'll comment --- unless it's to encourage you. If you really want to join him when he's surfing porn, just ask him. "Mind if I join you?" He'll either say yes or no.
Beyond those things, maybe my readers can offer some suggestions.
Readers?
16 comments:
I agree the roomie is an exhibitionist, and either Bi or heteroflexible. He may be straight and really unconcerned by another man seeing him naked, too. But he IS an exhibitionist.
The idea of asking if he can join a fap session is not outlandish. Especially if the writer finds the roomie attractive. Getting a 'no' would not kill him.
XOXO
It appears that he is very confident and maybe even interested in you watching. Most exhibs are also voyeurs. I'd say that you can have a conversation with him or you can just join in and see what happens. Start with being naked or almost naked. Then just make sure you put yourself in situations for him to see you naked if you aren't obvious about it. Personally, I would just come home and undress and tell him you decided to join him. Let nature take its course. If you get a boner and you both have a boner, a conversation will happen or you will both just follow nature. Good luck and I'm hard just thinking about your situation.
Play with yourself in your underwear. See if there is a reaction.
I agree, small steps. Start by sleeping naked, if you don't already. From there, it's a small step to walking to the bathroom naked in the morning to pee and shave and shower. Then, maybe, leave the bathroom door open. If (when) he sees you, don't make a big deal out of it, and he won't either. As you grow more confident, you can extend the amount of time you spend naked around him. As for joining him jerking off, the fact that he jerks off in front of you is virtually an invitation to join, but as Pat said, it's better to ask.
I live alone and have the freedom to be nude at home. My new boyfriend has come to embrace this new lifestyle when he is here. He even helped cohost a nude costume Halloween dinner party for 6 guys Last Saturday. I knew he was hooked when he came downstairs in the morning while wearing just his bedroom slipper. When my nephew comes for a visit, he will call and say Unc. put your pants on, I'm about 5 minutes away. I keep a pair of gym shorts near the door for unannounced guests.
If your reader's roommate is a fan of bedroom naturism and surfing porn, I don't see what I could say more or otherwise than what you said both with your words and with your photos.
Hugs and bisous, my darlings Jean and Pat.
Have a great day.
Having been raised by my Dad in an all-male household, I was used to naked males and open jacking off, seeing hard cock, having rods when other males were present. First, brother, learn to be proud of being male, of having a healthy dick, and how it works. Take a shower with the door open. Get up in the morning with your cock hard and walk out in front of your roomie. He has no business bitching if he's going the same. It's a matter of pride and confidence...in yourself and in your roomie. Go for the freedom!
The slow approach is nice, but it sounds like this has been going on long enough for the roomie to have a real great sense of what is appropriate and not... so, I say, simply mimic what you are being taught. Obviously this dude has no boundaries... so... be a tourist. Explore without your passport... just dive in.
Maybe start small and do one thing, that could be by sleeping naked, that way you begin the day naked. You can decide at what point you actually put clothes on. Then you can take it from there, are weekends a better time to try? No pressure. Good luck. Hugs and bisous.
Human beings do have a complex about nudity. Perhaps it springs from nudity being used as a signal for sexual interest because we have lost the biological indicators of the other animals and we haven't developed our communication skills to compensate, being ashamed still to talk about sex and our needs after previous puritanical bents.
The naturists have largely managed to separate nudity from sexual interest signaling and perhaps the OPs room mate is from that background, so don't expect the nudity to automatically be an invitation to romp.
When in Rome ...
It wouldn't hurt to communicate with the guy about his comfort with nudity and how envious the OP is about the ability to be so open. Once the OP gets more comfortable with nudity themselves, they can work up the courage to ask if the room mate is interested in company whilst watching porn.
I think men in general need to confront the homophobia that prevents them even considering having recreational sex with another man: it's simply shared enjoyment, you're not trying to have a baby and take over the role of women.
You already said what i was just about to write : just ask him. "Mind if I join you?"
Have some drinks with him, make yourself comfortable. Talk about funny and naughty things. When you both have to pee, accompany him to the toilet or the garden. So nonchalantly pee next to him (together into the toilet bowl or onto the same plant). This will make you feel a bit daring and he will surely like it. So you can continue in that mood. For example, you can ask him, when returning to the living room, to watch some porn together. Perhaps you might enjoy a buddy bait session then.
Do you have space for another one?
Do the same as your roommate does.
Similar thing happened with partner's dad (FIL soon). His dad is bit of a nudist and if he is comfortable around you he will be naked and expects you to be naked too. Partner and his dad have been naked around each other their whole life and it was a bit weird at first when his dad would stay over but now its nothing. His dad sees it as joining their club.
When his dad is over all of us walk around naked. The bathroom has become the communal gathering point; no one is in the main bathroom alone for long. One will be in the shower and two will be at the sink. Mornings all of us walk around with a hard on; his dad will hi5 himself if his dick is still hard and ours has gone down. We have all walked in on each other jerking off and no one has any issues jerking off together. Its like having an older brother and you all having competitions with each other. There has been many times his dad is stroking away and points at ours and tells us to get them up and lets go.
We got his dad his first fleshlight a while ago (a Tenga one). He loves it and now has 4 of them and leaves them all here (his mom doesnt want his dad having the toys at their house). Each time he comes over and his got another one he brings us one each too. He got the egg ones last time he stayed over to try out.
Does his attitude really bother you?
is he gay or bisexual? join him, to enjoy sex together.
is he straight and is he just an exhibitionist? you can tell him that his attitude bothers you.
@ T - I love that you are all that comfortable with each other. If only all men would be that at ease.
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