"Hope all is well. I am hoping for your very much needed wisdom. I have a buddy that I usually play weekly golf games with. We goof off and drink while playing. Talk about all the girls we had sex with when we were younger and so on and so forth. I have seen his dick before during our annual strip poker with our college buddies. But during our last round of golf, nature called and I went off to the woods. During which he came up and grabbed my dick. He laughed it off and said "just fucking with ya" later that night he sent 2 dick pics and a video of him jerking off. Am I reading too much into this, as this isn't his normal behavior? We have joked in the past about being bate buddies, since our wives were both pregnant at the time."
Well, I'd say, if it wasn't for the dick pics and jack off vid that, yes, he's only messing with you. But the pics and the video lead me to believe he's sending you a very clear message. He's ready and willing to turn the past jokes into reality.
It appears the ball is in your court - or, on your green. You'll have to find a way to let him know if you are actually interested and willing. You could accomplish that during your next golf outing with a beer in the clubhouse afterward.
Bate buddies can be a very good thing. Just like jacking off by oneself, it helps relieve the aching balls when your wives aren't accommodating,
but gives you the opportunity to form a closer bond with your friend.
Being closer gives you someone you can count on when the chips are down and you just need someone to listen, or you need help with some major chore or issue.
Readers, what's your take?
27 comments:
I would say he is sending a strong hint he wants to play. Send him back a video just like he sent you.
Totally agree ! Wish I had one right now !!!!
So no homo?
Or more on point, no Bi?
That dude seems to be pretty adept in strip poker with dudes and on sending dick picks and spank videos to other men? I am gay and I don't grab my friend's packages? Is this a straight thing I didn't know about? If a straight dude grabbed my dick, I'd grab his right back.
XOXO
In French we have an expression to designate those who are both gay and heterosexual, which proves that it is not uncommon… They say they are by sail and steam, and it is neither to be vicious nor a disease.
Hugs and bisous my darlings Jean and Pat.
Have a wondrous followed by a marvelous week.
I think He should just ask him directly if he's is serious about being bate buddies and let him know he's down if he's okay with it. The only problem with that is the guy may play it off like it was a joke and try to make him feel stupid for something he really wants. (I will never understand why people can't just be up front.) By sending that video he put the ball in the receiver's court. Maybe the reciever can send him a pic of himself hard not necessarily playing with himself but definitly hard throwing the ball back to the other guy. And take it from there. at some point they are going to have to talk about it, set up some ground rules like privacy issues. what each other expect from their sessions etc.
@ Mark - I totally agree. Good idea to respond in kind.
@ Six - It's a "thing" among str8 dudes to play jokes, like wagging their cocks at one another and doing other stupid shit like grabbing a friend's cock. But I'd say sending dick pics and j/o vids is a whole new realm in joking around. XOXO
@ MFP - I like that. Rather like the one here "His door swings both ways." Hugs and bisous.
@ Hooter - You and Mark are on the same wavelength. I think that's a splendid idea.
The JO vid is what gives it away to me. Hope the wife's fine with it; my ex (we broke up peacefully due to COVID-19, basically neither of us wanted to endanger the other's building) was, saw it as a male mystery of sorts, but not many women are so chill.
I would say don't read too much into this if I was him, and Just Go With It, and enjoy it. I don't know straight dudes that send dick pics and jack off videos to other straight guys.. he obviously wants to play. When I've gotten dick pics from straight friends it's because they knew I was gay and I would suck their dick. Or at least jack off with them.
I'm heading up to the woods Pat I'll see you Monday!
I'd say: play it like the vid he sent is an idea of the next game you could play together. Therefore your answer could be something like "I like the idea, let's play this together after our next golf course. I'll bring the drinks and you'll pick the video".
If his answer is he was just joking around then you'll just have to raise an eyebrow ad say "So did I, except for the drinks". That'll set the score with you being humorous and things will go on as usual.
But if he's being serious about it, then... Wish you both a fine time :-)
You should definitely let him know you're interested. It sure sounds like HE is.
I recommend being direct, "I liked the video and pics you sent." Its a clear, positive message that shows your openness without commitment. The buddy's got to step up to the tee, though. He trusts you. Hopefully he'll be direct too. He's sending an invitation...but to what? Lots of guys are bate buddies (or more), and get great pleasure from it. There's a whole reddit group just for that [r/jobudstories]. And none of that activity means "gay" unless you want it to.
Yep, he has said he wants to play, the real question is, how serious are you? You are an adult and get to make your own decisions.
Pat, get your umbrella out! Hot and humid, and lots of rain. Just like my neck of the woods.Hugs and bisous.
@ Laurent - That's the perfect out if his friend hits the brakes.
@ Anon - Some women are ok with it, some aren't. Too true.
Straight guys are really squemish about this kind of stuff. My suggestion if the author wants to do it. Then he should find ways to be nude around each other. Private pool suggest skinny dipping. Etc. Then while nude give a few strokes and see how he reacts. If he's okay then continue. He might join in or just watch the first time. But the ice will have been broken. And then you can suggest more later on.
It sounds like you're interested in you friend, which is something you have to be honest with about within yourself first, before you can even thinking about approaching him about his shenanigans. If you're cool with proceeding, I suggest asking him straight up why he grabbed your dick while you were taking a leak. Let him explain his behavior and see where it goes... Good luck!
@ Jean - Yesterday it kept threatening with clouds and thunder. Actually rained 3 times for about 5 minutes each. Then, last night lots of thunder, lightning, and a light steady rain for a couple hours. Today, bright and sunny. Tomorrow and Monday, if Hilary holds out, we're supposed to get slammed. Time to stay in with a good book or movie! Hugs and bisous.
Un ami comme ça pour moi c'est encore à connaitre. A friend like that for me is yet to be known.
I would challenge him in a friendly way. When you have your next golf date, make sure, you are both hydrated well. As soon as he goes for a pee, go with him and piss together with him. Then grab his cock and wait for his reaction. Perhaps he gets hard, or is already, and then explains his wishes. And if you are horny too, you can make up some buddy bait. Have fun!
Entrenched homophobia makes it difficult for men to be open about sexual interest with other men, as it's possible to get an aggressive reaction from a man who feels threatened. Consequently men have to resort to symbolism and indirect approaches to gauge the state of the other party. It's really unfortunate because symbolism can be misinterpreted, although the approach is often done in a way that can be passed off as a joke if not received well.
It would be interesting to know the reaction of the OP to having his dick grabbed. It was probably not aggressive as the other man followed up with more explicit suggestions upping the ante.
The OP hasn't said if they are open to some enjoyable exploration. If they are, then one response could be to thank the other guy for those communications and say they were wondering who was going to make the first move and suggest they talk about it at the next golf game. Could break the ice by referring back to the joke about being bate buddies perhaps no longer being a joke because of ...
I'm an out gay man now for over 24 years. I was married to a woman and had a few bate buddies through the years who were also married. Having that first conversation about it is so awkward. It sounds like the friend has pushed that conversation right out in front and is waiting for a response. I would just outright say to him that you like the pics and wondered if you could see it in person. Tell him there is no need to be awkward if both of you have a need to take care of. Sit back and let him answer. I will STRONGLY agree that this can make your friendship stronger. Straight males who share these kind of experiences learn what women already know about friendships, they are necessary and the more you share the stronger the bond. I hope he updates you with what happens :).
In my experience drunk guys don't often remember what they say or do as rspects sex. Hence why "God was I drunk" remains a popular defense among the curious. I would have a sober conversdation with the dude, show him what you received and ask him what he wants, stressing there is no judgement forthcoming. A friend had this happen to him and he explained to the dude, " I'm like Secret Deodorant, Strong enough for a Man, but made for a Woman." Personally, if the guy said he wanted some hanky panky, I would like see what I could do to accomodate him. The key being everyone knows what's really goin on up front.
I had a fuck buddy that started off like that, too. Just horsing around when a innocent grope by him lingered just a little longer. We both realized we had needs to get our rocks off. He turned into a little bear bottom - loved to be ridden!
Something similar happened to me with my good buddy. Granted we both were a little stoned. He knew that I was gay. When we talked about it, he was the one who fell to his knees and started sucking me off. For it being his first time, he seemed like a pro. We were in some woods.. We went to my house and played around for several hours. I was very surprised when I was ready to come that he locked his arms around my ass so I couldn’t move. He swallowed every last drop of cum. I did the same with him. We played every Friday and Saturday night for 3 years before I moved out of state. But sure enough every time I went back for a visit, we would go to the store to get ice. You know what I mean. Yep. Fun times.
Post a Comment