Too Much Lube?

Another question recently sent by a straight dude.

"I'm in my early 20s and have been married for a couple of years now. My wife gets really wet during sex. I mean excessively wet. We put a towel under her and it gets soaked very quickly. Then add that I'm a pretty heavy leaker, myself. My pre-cum flows like a faucet left on constant drip. But, here's the problem. There's zero friction on my penis. I don't feel anything. Then she gets aggravated because it's takes me too long to cum. Meanwhile I get frustrated because I need to ejaculate and can't. I get so desperate that I pull out, wipe off my cock, and jack off. She feels bad, and I'm tired of shooting my load all over her, or on myself, instead of being able to cum inside her like a normal guy. So, what can we do? Is there anything that will help us?"

Well, this poses a problem for guys. While many medical sites do note that most women encounter the exact opposite (too dry), this isn't really uncommon either. The typical suggested solution is to keep a towel handy to occasionally wipe off your cock, but that interrupts the fun. Another suggestion was to have her keep a tampon handy to soak up and dry out, but that also brings the fun to a halt.

Men need the friction. It's that simple. Too much lubrication just dulls everything. When we are young and beginning to masturbate, we do so without any lube at all.

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That's part of the reason we cum so quick when we begin to "dip our wicks" with the ladies. And, then we continue to jack off dry.

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If we do use lube we use it fairly sparingly.

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A couple medical websites have suggested the use of OTC non-drousy allergy or cold medications, such as Claritin or Benadryl, and couples have reported a measure of success. These meds dry up sinus, but they also dry up other mucus membrane tissue - which is why when a man takes them he produces less semen. She should take one a couple of hours before sex to allow it to work.

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You also need to have a very frank discussion with your wife. We can understand her aggravation, but she must learn to understand your need to ejaculate.

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To not do so will result in a lot of pain and discomfort for you with a sever case of blue balls.

And the swelling and aching can last for days

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until they're relieved.

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If the OTC meds don't work, I'd suggest that once she's reached orgasm you switch to jacking off

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(she could offer to help, BTW, with a bit of hand and mouth stimulation).

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But, in a total switch from the old rhythm method of contraception, hover over her until you know you're about to shoot, then plunge back in. That would at least provide you with the finish you crave.

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But, either way, remember that ejaculation is important to your health - both mental and physical.

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Have a great weekend, everyone.