Dear Doctor

Dear Doctor/Physicians Assistant/Nurse Practitioner:

We, your male patients, need a bit of prodding. No, not a prostate exam! Well, okay, that too, but...

We realize that medical practice has changed over the years - drastically changed. We know you are forced to see more patients a day than is practical because of the minuscule payment you receive from our insurance, or because you're working for some huge medical conglomerate due to the exorbitant costs of malpractice insurance. So, we understand you have only 10 minutes to examine, diagnose an issue, and write the prescription. We get that. It's why there are so many Urgent Care places. Add in the Machismo Factor - you know, where we won't see a doctor until we can no longer bear a situation.

Sometimes, though it's rare, sometimes, you'll ask before you rush off to the next exam room, "Is there anything else?" We'll quickly respond, "No." even though there really is. See, for some ridiculous reason, we're too embarrassed to talk about it.

Oh, sure, we'll make jokes about sex and boners and jerking off - even in "mixed company" as it were. See, when it comes to talking with a medical professional about our penises or our testicles, for some stupid reason, we're suddenly as tongue-tied as a 5-year old; we can't even bring ourselves to demurely say, "You know...things...aren't working very well." We'd rather continue wrestling with an uncooperative cock than admit - yes, even to you, the medical professional who knows all about our anatomy and how it should function - we can't get a hard-on, or we can't cum, or we cum too fast, or, or, or.

So, here's a simple request: Please ask us, "How are your erections? Still solid? How is your urine stream? Strong?"

Prod us if need be. Better yet, shrug off the lab coat (figuratively, of course) and become that friend at the bar, be relate-able: "So, any trouble getting a hard-on? Having any trouble taking a leak? Any problem with your balls I should know about? Any issues when you cum?"

See, using those kinds of layman's terms will put us right at ease and help us to open up.

Sincerely,

All Guys, Everywhere