Issues here at the house - again! Sheesh, can't a guy catch a break? But, at least mine is fixable. Not so much for the guy who wrote in on Aug 4....
"She refused to talk to me all week long - except in response to our daughter's needs. Saturday morning, I made her sit in the kitchen and gave it to her straight. She may be happy living without sex, but after 2-1/2 years I'm tired of having to hide while I masturbate to relieve the aching balls. Something has to change. I gave her an ultimatum: Go get help for whatever the problem is (and I named off some of the things your readers suggested), or I'm done. I told her I'd give her some time to think about it and took our daughter to visit my parents.
Well, I got my answer when we returned three hours later to an empty house. A note on the table telling me she couldn't do it anymore. Not marriage, not parenting. Essentially, she's abandoned me and our daughter. I'm angry, I'm hurt, and I'm relieved all at the same time. Is that weird?
Now I'm a single dad. I think I'm going to need that FWB a couple of your readers mentioned. I feel like I want to make up for lost time. Now, I just want to get with someone and get my rocks off. Is that awful? How do I find someone like that, someone to take on a single dad who wants no strings attached????"
First let me offer my condolences. And, I don't think your reaction is weird at all. You have a right to your emotions; they're justified after such a long period of time. Is it awful that you now want to make up for the sex you've done without, to take care of that seemingly incessant boner?
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Not at all. There are plenty of people (men and women) who are open to booty-call relationships.
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In the meantime...though you'll have to ensure your daughter isn't around, you're free to jack off as much as you want now without having to hide.
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Readers
suggestions on where he might begin his search for a FWB????
8 comments:
Trust the house problems can be sorted. Feel sorry for that guy! I'm a bit far away to make any suggestions. Spring seems to be in the air here! Take care!
There's always CraigsList - I used it before meeting Jerry - and met a few nice guys, but an awful lot of flakes on there, too.
I say don't let the door hit her ass on the way out!!!!! Dear reader....LIVE...LIVE! Life is a banquet, and some poor suckers are starving to death. It's time for you to be happy, you can't go living like that. Now... if your looking for a FWB may I offer my services??
Great post Whkattk! Sorry to hear of the house woo's again. But nice to see your readers are learning from your blog. It's all worth it when you can help just one person even.
Condolences to the reader who wrote you. It's not weird, but was it a blessing or a curse? Three hours? Either the first five minutes of these three hours? A woman who decides so quickly to run away by abandoning not only her house and her husband but also his daughter had certainly already decided to make it and was waiting only for the first opportunity to pounce on this chance.
Condolences, therefore, except as regards the fact of having not added who know how many supplementary periods of two years and a half cut from the same cloth!
As for me, I shall no wait so long, my darlings Jean and Pat, for wishing you a wondrous day with many bisous.
Postscript:
Dear Pat, in English "issues" = "problems"; in French: "issues" = "exits". I gladly offer you my French issues to go out of your English issues.
And suppose in a couple weeks she has a change of heart and wants to come back? I think he needs to give their marriage a cooling off period. He probably could use some counseling, and your advice, his right (or left) hand.
What about one of those "Fleshlight" sex toys, that way he can stay untangled for now?
Hugs and bisous.
This almost parallels my own experince - 10 years of marriage - 2 years with no sex --
Got an apartment, filed for divorce (after many discussions trying to salvage the marriage) and, on my first weekend in the new apt. I had sex with a 3 different partners - FIRST WEEKEND! Awesome!
1. Let me also offer a hearty bye Felicia to her. So long, farewell, don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya.
2. First priority is, of course, taking care of yourself and your daughter.
3. For me, jerkoff buds just happened. The first ones were close childhood friendships that added masturbation as we hit puberty. In college, my roommate became a jerkoff buddy, as did a few guys I caught. (There's actually a whole underground JO and frot scene among athletes, bodybuilders, and pro wrestlers. Most of them have wives or girlfriends. None of them want to be penetrated. This knowledge has been an oasis during dry spells.) The third source has just been guys at the gym or in the men's room or similar who have never seen one as big as mine or one with a foreskin and want to see how it works. For straight sex, I just go for traditional relationships.
There are also apps you can try. I have no experience there, but have heard nothing but bad things about hookup apps. Then again, it's to empty your nuts, not have long meaningful conversations.
It's a tough situation, but it seems that the writer had been emotionally abandoned long before this. Her exit simply confirms what he was feeling all along.
In some cities, including Cleveland where I live, there are men's jack off groups. I've attended a few times, and though it's a bit awkward at first, it's sure nice to be naked with other men, get bold with mutual touch when I'm ready, and stroke with others who may be in the same situation. There are group rules of "no lips below the hips" during the regular group gathering,but there's an option to remain after hours and engage in more penetrative experiences. This might be one way to meet others with no strings. But you might also meet someone and exchange contact info for private time.
In our group, there are men of all ages, colors and sizes. The variety is nice, and attendees can stand against the wall and watch, or connect with someone if they are interested.
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