"OK now I feel bad. I think that dude who wrote about the massage is my client. My only excuse for not taking care of him is that was the first time he ever got hard and I don't handle first-time erections. Despite that it's all part of the massage it's still considered prostitution and a therapist needs to be cautious. But this guys been a client long enough that I knew better. Would you post this for him? Dude, next time the session is on me and if you get another erection I promise you will not leave with it."
Your sense of caution is warranted. A therapist can lose the license over that. It's kind of you to offer a free massage. I'm going to suggest the next time he comes in --- if he's not too embarrassed to return --- you have a subtle conversation with him before beginning the massage.
I can only hope he stops in here and reads on a regular basis. But here's what you should really do: Rather than depending on his reading this, reach out to reassure him there's no reason for shame, make your promise then, and book another appointment.
14 comments:
Again, the intricacies of a massage session never cease to amaze me. Are people that starved for touch? I don't get it.
XOXO
The best thing is not to dramatize, to do and say things in all simplicity and in a good mood to solve what is not a problem.
Hugs and bisous, my darlings Jean and Pat.
Have a marvelous day.
I have paid for a couple of professional massages, but never was anything sexual. Now one of our groups had a massage party with 5 guys massaging someone at the same time rotating around the table for 25 minutes. Then each person gets a turn on the table. Using 2 tables a total of 12 guys got massages. Some got erections and others did not. Even though we were all gay, there were no happy endings on the table. There were a lot of relaxed guys that evening.
@ Six - A massage is one of the best ways to relax, to get all the kinks and knots worked out of muscles. It's soothing to mind, body, and spirit - even without the proverbial happy ending. XOXO
@ Hooter - I can imagine. That sounds like a great massage group. Had to be a wonderful experience - boners or no boners. Settings like that - the goal is not ejaculation but soothing, calming, relaxing.
We're all adults, could massage therapists cover this up front for their male customers, they'll know what's legal in their state and what's not, should they pass that info on? Hugs and bisous.
Wow, what a coincidence that the masseuse wrote! He sounds very professional - and helpful.
Um, yeah, no. I am a licensed, registered massage therapist and there is and will be NO sexual touch between my clients and myself. For far too many years, massage has been a thinly veiled front for prostitution, and we professional therapists are still fighting to get that image out of the public consciousness. I spent far too long (and too much money) in school learning anatomy, neurology, muscular systems, etc. to be providing happy endings. That is not what legitimate Massage Therapy is about - it is about providing a therapeutic touch through the manipulation of soft tissues that interacts with the client's nervous system to induce a state of deep relaxation. If a guy gets an erection during a session, it is no big deal, but there is no way in hell I am touching it - I continue on with the session ignoring it. Sex work not a service that ANY of the Therapists that I know provide.
That said, I have no qualms about the reality of sex work. It exists, and needs to be recognized as legitimate work, but Massage Therapy is NOT sex work.
I've been giving Body Electric protocol erotic massages for almost 30 years now, and have avoided worrying about legal risk by not charging $ for the massage, since it isn't my livelihood Also hosted group massage sessions in the '90's for 6 - 12 men. A BE massage relaxes the client with back massage, including rosebud massage if the client needs that, then when he's face up, raising energy in the magic wand and circulating it through the whole body with my hands. Although BE teaches to avoid happy endings, I'll let my clients ask for what they want. Often I'll get massaged in return. I estimate I've given upwards of 1000 erotic massages!
love these gifs!
@ VirginianCanadian - I get it. It has been a tough road to legitimacy. Is okay for a therapist to allow the client to take care of it themselves once the massage is done?
To cross this line... take it off line. As in... it becomes a personal relationship rather than a professional one... or, to have both... be upfront ahead of time of which kind of appointment one is scheduling. Communication... it clears things up and keeps it simple.
If I was a cynic, I might think that tying massage into prostitution and thus making it illegal, was an ideal way, in combination with entrenched homophobia, to deter men from exploring same sex sexual fulfilment in what is about the only avenue that most readily supports it, however inadvertently, and thus depriving men of an avenue in breaking the existing monopoly of women and outdated shame.
Most older men are already extremely shy of exploring sexual expression with other men and there is no encouragement at all, in fact the opposite. A massage is the closest thing they can come to exploration without a challenging direct approach.
I'm reminded of the masseur who posted some while ago about his Father cautiously exploring via massage, yet how surprised and conflicted that masseur was, despite allowing exploration for other men.
We have some seriously entrenched taboos that need to be challenged that are effectively throwing the baby out with the bathwater.
Out of interest, does anyone know what the law actually is in relation to sexual stimulation, whether paid or not and any associated rules for the regulating body of therapeutic masseurs, in your particular area?
@ uptonking - it's difficult to take it offline, because the sexual aspect is only a small part of the massage itself, but tied to it by virtue of massaging structures around it and influencing it.
I would suspect that even if it was viewed as a separate thing, not paid for, the fact it was being performed by a professional who would otherwise be paid for their service would make it problematic.
There is also the issue of consent and how that can be managed to consider in the equation.
However, I believe it is an issue that needs to be tackled openly and resolved in society, not skulked behind closed doors which just increases the shame factor.
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