Saturday, October 15, 2016

Teach Your Sons

This takes the place of my usual Buddy Ball Check.

"I've been following your blog for a long time now and I know you are always harping on fathers to educate their kids. But what if you don't have a dad? Mine died when I was two. All my mom or anyone would ever tell me is that he died of cancer - never what kind.
I'm 24 now and just had a double orhiectomy I think is what they call it when they cut off your balls. They also took out lymph glands. Chemo makes me sicker than a dog and leaves me so weak I can't walk.
My dad died from ball cancer at the age of 27 and my mom never told me until the day before my surgery. I'm so pissed off at her I can't stand to look at her or talk to her and haven't since. I banned her from my hospital room and rely on a couple of buddies to help me. I mean what kind of person does that? She was more afraid of talking about balls than of me dying that's what I think. Well here I am with my chances less than 50-50 right now and I hope she's happy.
I know I would've gotten the cancer regardless, but you know maybe I would've been more careful and paid more attention. Maybe I would've gone for a ball check. I did the self exams you tell us to, but I guess I didn't really know what I was doing. I had no early warning signs, no ball pain or anything. It snuck up on me. I got sick and went to urgent care and before I knew it I was in the hospital and getting prepped for the operation.
Tell your readers they really need to take this shit seriously."

I was at a loss for words, other than to express my deepest sympathy for the death of his father, my hopes of a full recovery and he lives a long and happy life.
Ladies, if you have sons and you have no male role model for those boys, this young man is a perfect example of why you need to put on your big girl panties. A life is far more important than a few minutes of anyone's embarrassment. Teach your sons about their bodies!
Dads, that goes for you too, are you paying attention here?
 Teach your sons how to do a Ball Check. 
And make sure you and your sons both have the doctor include a thorough ball check during an annual physical.


mistress maddie said...

My own father never told me anything. My best friends, the one you told me about jacking off, is the one who told us about ball check's. And I'm glad he did. My thoughts are too, with your reader on a full recovery.

Spear said...

I( grew up in a household like mention here. Only difference was nobody died early but also nobody said anything about body parts either. I learned more from experience than anyplace else. I made it a point to learn as much as I could about my body and it working parts. I cannot say it any better than what's being said here, Talk to your sons early in life and don't spare the dialogue.

Xersex said...

I'm so sorry for that guy!

Anonymous said...

WOW! How sad!

I'm still getting over 400 visits a day. So I'll leave it there for a while longer!

Have a great weekend!

RockHard said...

This is for the young man whose story you shared. I understand how sick you are. I survived stage-3 colon cancer. I say you have no idea what sick is until chemo has made you sick. I'll say a prayer for you. Please keep in touch with Pat and let us know how you are. I too had parents who were no help. I had double inguinal hernia as a child. I asked my mother. She didn't know. She said go ask your dad. He didn't know. Taking me to a doc was the last thing they'd do. We had to be sick unto death before we could see a doc. I lived with that pain until I was an adult and could see a doc on my own. Btw, it was an ad for trusses in the back of a magazine I saw at the barber shop that I figured out I had two hernias. Imagine, a child and I had to live with it. I pray the best for you.

whkattk said...

@ RockHard - That's just horrible! To make someone suffer through that kind of pain...and the thought of the further amount of damage that could've been done makes my balls crawl. And I'm sorry you went through that. This is the kind of thing that pisses me off about the attitudes we have when it comes to men's cocks and balls.

Jay in Denver said...

Pat: What a strong message, as I can only imagine what the young man you published his story is going through not only physically but emotionally as well, and what still is ahead for him.

One pain, one emotion that he is dealing with and will for ever possibly is the potential loss of the relationship with his Mother. A loss that he has some control over and one that only he can control at this point.

Hopefully he can find a way to understand that there is no way a Mother has the ability to harm her child, to do something or fail to do something that would case pain and possibly death in a later life. Maybe his Mother just did not have the tools to deal with it, maybe, as so many children do, she was not raised in a family herself that was open to personal topics and she just did not have the tools to deal. The death of her husband at such an early age was traumatic and possibly she did not know how to deal with it herself.

Not having your Mother in you life, even in the cases when they have disappointed you so greatly the love they have for the child is so enormous that the support they will have for you at this time for treatments and recovery will help in ways you may not currently realize you have.

Parents are not always 100% correct as we so strongly expect them to be, they too did not receive a handbook on how to deal with all the challenges that life would bring, they just do the best they can.

Speaking from experience the anger you have for your Mother today may not out weigh the values a Mother brings in the balance of your life.

SickoRicko said...

Very sad story.

whkattk said...

@ Jay in Denver - I, too, told him he needs to think - dig deep - to understand why his mother (or any other relative, for that matter) never told him exactly what killed his father. He's got a lot of soul-searching to do but, as I told him, he must first get better. He needs to put all of his energy into fighting for his life. Once he is on the path to recovery, he should (finally) answer his mother's repeated calls and talk to her. I can't imagine that she wished this upon him; it's more like she didn't know that this is pretty much like breast cancer - if Dad had ball cancer, the chances of his son(s) developing it increase tremendously.

whkattk said...

@ mistress - Thank goodness you have good friends like that. Men - regardless of sexual orientation - must learn to share information. And, if I was a part of making that happen in your circle, I'm very happy to have been of help. Hugs!!!