Aging can do things to us we are not prepared for, things we do not like at all. But there are other factors at play.
"Your post today made me decide to write. My partner and I are in our mid 50s, both in decent health. Lately I've had issues with getting a hard-on. I still find him attractive and sexy, but for some reason my cock doesn't respond. I wake up with a solid erection a good portion of the time. My doctor has done a complete physical, ran my T levels, and says everything is normal for "a man of my age." Great. So what keeps me from getting it up?"
If you're in good health, fit physically, your T levels are normal, and you get morning wood (more often than not, if I read you correctly) we tend to look in other directions. Can you get a solid erection to masturbate?
You don't say how long you have been a couple. But, it's true that love grows and lust fades; the newness wears off, arousal levels drop. Yes, even if you still think of him as "hot and sexy as fuck."
So, I'm going to suggest you try some new things: New places to have sex, new positions and, above all, a new sense of self - which your partner can help you with.
Have him give you a massage. Slow, soft, sensual. Let him stroke your cock, and play with your balls. No rush, no pressure to get hard, no end game in sight. Just allow yourself to lie back, empty your mind of everything but the sensations in your body, and enjoy it. You don't even need a table.
If he doesn't get naked, all the better because this is about you rediscovering your body.
You could also try watching some porn and jacking off together. Whether it leads to mutual touching strokes, or not, the idea is to enjoy it without any pressure to satisfy anyone but yourself.
Readers, any other suggestions?