You Gotta Try It

 

"I saw the comment from anonymous about prostate fun and decided I had to write. I've been reading this blog for a long time and everytime there was a post about ass play I thought what a load of gay bullshit crap. Right up until got my first prostate exam. Talk about an instant hardon and bent over that table thought I would gonna shoot right there. I kept my back to him to pull my pants over my dick so he wouldn't know.  It took some doing but finally my wife agreed to use a strap on and I blew biggest load of my life. Now whenever I want scream out loud toes cureled orgasm I'll lay down and toss my legs in the air and she straps up and plunges in.  I swear to you my straight bros you want to cum and cum hard like never before you gotta try it."

I hate to break it to you, but I'm pretty sure your doctor knew about that raging boner. From the view he had, and the position of his finger(s), an erection is pretty difficult to miss.

The root portion of the shaft runs along the Perineum (the Taint) and the girth matches the part of your cock you can see,

There's a reason for that full-on boner, or at least a semi, during your prostate exam. Pressure on the gland helps with blood retention in the cock. You can test that theory by using external prostate pressure at the very root end --- right above the anus.

It's taking straight guys years to catch on and understand what many gay men have known and experienced for ... well, forever. The male G-Spot is the prostate. As the idea spreads, the issue becomes --- as you've found out --- convincing their wives and girlfriends of that. As Dan Savage keeps saying, partner satisfaction in the bedroom is all about GGG (Good, Giving, and Game).

Not convinced yet, straight dudes? There are options to try it without anyone else knowing. The Aneros Prostate Massager, or even the Butt Plug.

The other thing that should make it perfectly clear that the prostate is a pleasure palace? Try externally massaging your prostate next time you jack off.

Enjoy Them Together

Money and sex are the greatest cause of arguments leading to divorce/separation. Clearly, we need more communication with both.

Sex toys. Billions of dollars spent each year. So, why do we hide them? If we find something pleasurable we should be able to tell a partner. Like the man in yesterday's post, there is no reason to get rid of them, no reason to hide them.

If something enhances the experience for us, why shouldn't it be used?

Like an email I received from a guy a few months ago:

"I forgot to stash my Fleshlight after cleaning it. My brother-in-law comes out of the bathroom and asked if his sister knew about it. I told him that she did and had no issues with me having it or using it and went on to tell him that sometimes she uses it on me. Sometimes we just use toys together just to pleasure ourselves. He was amazed. ... Is it unusual for couples to have toys like this?"

Sadly, my answer was, "Yes." He found she liked using a vibrator, so he bought her one and sometimes uses it on her. The fact that neither one of them felt threatened by an inanimate object puts them way ahead of the game.

As Jessica Wildfire explains in her article "Of Shame and Sex Toys," 'There's never any shame in pleasuring your partner. No matter how you get there. If your partner loves you, they won't judge.'

It's really no different than saying you enjoy oral sex. 

So, don't hide the toys. Use them.

Enjoy them.

Enjoy them together. 

Straight Men Do, Too

Two things. First an update.

"I got your second response and took the advice. I called my sister and got a very hearty "Please!" when I suggested a talk with her son. "Jesus Christ, maybe he'll calm down a bit if he knows he's got permission to jerk off." So, the talk went well. He understood my misgivings about dropping trou and showing him, as my wife suggested. Judging by the amount of paper towels in the waste basket, he thoroughtly enjoyed the clips you suggested. The questions after were straight-forward and easy to answer. I think he's actually relieved to find out he's just a normal horny teen."

Well, so there ya go. It's easier than we all fear when we face The Talk. The next email was a bit onerous at first.

"Why do gay dudes love taking it up  the ass so much?"

Well, pardner, it ain't just gay men who enjoy that. You've heard about the women's G-Spot? Well, for men, there's this thing called the Prostate. Manipulating and stimulating it increases the hardness of a boner, and it feels really good.

Look up "pegging" and you'll discover that straight men "love taking it up the ass," too. 

External pressure, or pushing a finger in...

And, though not too many will openly admit to it, but leave them alone in a room with their wife's or girlfriend's vibrator....

There's so much more to sexual pleasure than your cock. 

So Much Unsaid

I know there are a good many women who follow, and I am so very grateful for Jean who contributes with comments and emails. I also know there are a good many Straight dudes who follow and I wish they would comment (even anonymously) or send emails. It helps to further the conversations. It really does.

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Of course, that is not to take away from all the gay guys who read and leave comments. Be assured I am grateful for you and love you all, too!

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Faithful Readers, Your French Patrick and Jean, both raised some very interesting things. Jean comments that we men are much more complicated than we let on. Yes, that's an understatement. Not only do we hide it from the opposite sex, we hide it from one another. We guys are notoriously closed-off for the most part. So then God forbid, if we can't share information with our buddies, we should even think of sharing it with our sons. Even though there seems to be a myriad of things that can affect their health, not to mention a healthy sex life.

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Then, Your French Patrick brings the notion that if a son is gay, what could a straight father teach him about, say...anal sex.

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Well, first off, straight men know about anal sex - some engage in the activity with their spouses. My first wife loved anal sex and would ask me for it. I accommodated her, of course - what guy turns down sex when his wife is actually in the mood (that's meant as facetious; I know it happens often!). 

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On the receiving end - there's a growing acknowledgement that anal penetration feels damn good as word continues to spread that the prostate is the Male G Spot. And, yes, it is.

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For straight dudes who have discovered this - and have been brave enough to share it with their partners - the activity is known as "pegging." The use of a strap on dildo enables their wives and girlfriends to help their men achieve terrific orgasms this way.

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But, a father who can't bring himself to even discuss boners or jacking off with a son,

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certainly isn't going to instruct him on the pleasures of oral enjoyment or anal penetration - as either a giver or receiver. 

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And, that's sad, too. We leave so much untouched that needs to be talked about.

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