"I work for a company that has decided its time to get back to work. That means they'll be sending us back out on the road. Only because money is tight I'll be sharing a hotel room. I'm 28 and still have a really hard erection every morning that won't go away until I pee. Now we've seen each other in the gym showers and stood at urinals but no guy has ever seen me with a hard. I don't want him getting the wrong impression like I'm hitting on him or something. I have no idea how to deal with this. Any suggestions?"
We all wake up with boners. Not 100% of the time, but on a very regular basis. Some dissipate almost immediately, some last a few minutes or so, some - like yours - don't go down without a fight. There is anecdotal evidence that a full bladder contributes to hardness. The added pressure placed on the prostate helps keep that sphincter closed.
First things first. The dude you're having to share a room with damn well should know the difference between morning wood and arousal. If he doesn't, he's very poorly informed about his own body.
Three ideas. First, do your best to piss just before you hit the sack. Your full bladder may be contributing to the rigidity of the morning erection, which is also going to make it last longer.
The second: Steel your resolve as stiff as your morning wood to ignore it. Get out of bed and do what you need to do. If he notices - he will - chances are he won't say a word. If he notices - he will - and says something, makes some kind of a joke (which is pretty normal for how most men handle these things) play along. It will ease the embarrassment for both of you.
The third suggestion: Pull him aside before the trip - maybe at the gym, that's a nice neutral spot - and explain to him that your morning wood is quite persistent. That way there will be no surprises; he'll know what to expect, and you can both go about your morning routine to get ready for the workday.
How did you handle it?
15 comments:
I think you pretty much cover it all up. Aren't males used to seeing boners? Any man with brothers or who has gone on camping trips or has been in a locker room has seen chubs. Laughing it off is what guys usually do, no?
Now, I for one avoid the situation, because I really LIKE gawking at boners, but two straight guys? I don't see the issue. He can also wear roomy pajama bottoms, no?
XOXO
If the reader is that worried, either sleep in underwear or keep them handy to slip on under the covers before getting up. Even if he sees the guy is hard in his underwear, most guy won't think I thing of that. If people aren't comfortable with seeing others nude I could see why it might make for uncomfortableness....but like you said I knew very few men that don't wake up hard.
Your suggestions are spot-on.
I've never shared my bedroom with anyone for more than a few hours, but your three tips strike me as very relevant. Above all, the third which logically should suffice if the friend is reasonable, or even more so if he is in the same situation. If it embarrasses your reader to tell that to him, he can do it in writing.
In writing, as you and me.
Hugs and bisous, my darlings Jean and Pat.
Actually in the age of COVID I wouldn't share a room with anybody. That seems more important than a morning boner [which I'm sure this guy has probably experienced].
Isn't it odd how time can change your perspective. This reader is 28 and self conscious about his morning wood...I'm nearly 72 and it's all I can do to keep from standing in the front yard and showing my morning wood to the world.
Yes, even at my age morning wood happens. If I have a lot of liquid in the evening that I don't get rid of the result in the morning is raging. Like Whkattk says, try to urinate before you go to bed. Also as Whkattk says, be honest and open with your roomie. Remember, he may have the same concerns. After all, we are men and we all have a penis.
Could carry a notebook to bed. LOL I think just make light of it and move on. like Dang, wood every single morning. He's another guy so he knows and like you said if he doesn't then that's really on him. I hope all is going well with you, my Dear Friend. Hugs, Licks, and Strokes, AOM
I'm probably an exception, but I never wake up with an erection, unless I'm having an erotic dream.
When going in to your room, pick the bed near the bath and get up on that side. Another suggestion if you sleep nude, you may want to consider a couple things, like wearing night clothing or have a house coat by your bed. As stated this occurs quite a bit, if your "room mate" is older he will know. You have seen each other already in the gym, then i really don't see the issue. You guys are going to be together, so don't let this be a "hang up" between you, deal with it when it happens, he will say something or ignore it, but eventually he will, and the suggestion on emptying your bladder before bed will help.
When I was 25 I had to share a room with a coworker at the last minute. Me being gay and him straight, made me nervous. Would he think I was checking him out, blah blah blah. After the first night, I realized we're just guys. Period. It was no big deal.
Personally I wouldn't say anything beforehand as that just makes an issue out of something that shouldn't be an issue. Besides, does this other guy live under a rock? Like what guy is not aware of morning wood?
I'll assume you're not sleeping naked? So it's not like you'll be parading around suggestively. LOL Anyway, in the morning just be about your business and give it no thought. Own it.
Who knows, maybe he's worried about the same thing - or he doesn't give it any thought. Either way, it's only a big deal if you make it a big deal. So don't.
@ Six - men ought to be real familiar with boners, that's for sure. I've seen plenty in the locker room at the gym - and not just chubs, either.
@ Bruce - LOL! Yeah, at 68, these days if I manage to get a full, standing-straight-up hard-on I want to wag it in front of the entire neighborhood!
This happened to me during the beginning of my freshman year in college. Our "pod" dorm system had 4 rooms (or was it 6) sharing a smallish sized, public style bathroom with an open shower with 3 shower heads. Back then there were no partitions or curtains. Of course, most freshmen have 8 a.m. classes which meant we were all in the bathroom together getting ready on most days.
On about day two I think it was, I had a boner that wouldn't quit but I dare not be late on day 2. So, in the shower I went, flagpole and all.
Well, being the juvenile delinquents we were at 19, I got pointed out and ridiculed. I got mad and told them to shut up and to go fuck themselves, as I continued washing.
Thank goodness, about 3 days later, another guy had the same problem I did. A couple guys poked endless fun at him and wouldn't stop. Then, one of the other guys said, "Would you guys shut up. Don't you ever get a morning hard-on?" And that ended it. After that, if someone was sporting a boner or semi, we looked but no one cared. Or at least, I don't think they did.
I'd say stop making a big deal out of it an ignore it and continue on. It's called life of a young male.
@ Anon - Yeah, that last guy had the goods on them. The right attitude is "we all get morning boners."
We are all boys together, right? So why is a normal part of male life still being used to ridicule and instill shame?
I put it down to ongoing homophobia and the fact that parents are still not educating their youngsters about the facts of life, but clinging to the birds and bees.
Believing an erection can be an indicator of sexual interest in another person and thus a source of fear is a terrible double whammy indictment of how retarded our thought processes have become: men get erections for all kinds of reasons and even if another person is aroused by your presence, isn't that kind of flattering and both being men the opportunity for sexual assault is low. It is entirely possible that any fear is more about the person liking what is happening and resulting in internalised homophobia. We really need to dissuade society from thinking that sex between men is unmanly.
@ Anon - You've hit on both reasons: Poorly educated and homophobia.
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