Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Failure to Launch

"I've been a solosexual all my life. Recently, I am not able to ejaculate. No matter what I try I get right to the brink but can't go over the edge. Just as it feels like I'm going to my dick goes limp. It's frustrating as hell. A guy I've known for years says we should try doing it together or that we should go to the local j/o group. I'm skittish but getting desperate for relief. What gives?"



If you've tried all the tricks I've mentioned in the blog over the years; thrusting and squeezing the butt cheeks, direct prostate stimulation, change in location, sleeves, and cock rings, and there's still a failure to launch, I'm not sure I have an answer.
Our cocks go soft at varying rates after we cum. It sounds as if the brain is sending a signal (chemical in nature) that the ejaculation has happened. If there's a medical solution to that, I can't find one.
Maybe you should give your friend's suggestions a try. I mean, what do you have to lose? It either helps you cum or it doesn't. If it does, you get the physical (and mental) relief you need. If it doesn't, you aren't any worse off than if you keep trying alone.





I know some of my readers are in the medical field; perhaps they might offer ideas.


Xersex said...

"A guy I've known for years says we should try doing it together or that we should go to the local j/o group"

it coulld be a great idea!

Thom Zee said...

Is it possible he's having "retrograde ejaculations"?

Patrick said...

Sorry! Can't help there! Thanks for your continuing visits and comments. Off this afternoon to a hand surgeon, as my left thumb probably needs surgery!!! I hope your condition is improving.

SickoRicko said...

I'm afraid I'm of no help.

Fang, Down Under. said...

If you still want to maintain solo sex maybe try just doing the company of someone else. The sight and sound of someone else is sometimes a turn on enough. I have also found that just touching someone else and being aware of their reaction is a real turn on enough to get one over the edge. Occasionally I find the same problem, just can't get to the final ejaculation but if I use just 5 mg of Cialis I have no problem. I am still strong in the sex department and I'm 82.

A French Patrick said...

In France, the carrying of firearms was authorized only in our department of the French Guyana for (less and less) valid local reasons, and, in May, 2016, because that is not in the constitution, a simple order of the prefect has been enough for reducing considerably this authorization.
In the USA, we can admit (or not) that this authorization was justified in the times of the West Conquest and the Gold Rush, but regrettably it was registered in the constitution which has no vocation to regulate local or temporary circumstances.
Since then, the opinions of the partisans and the opponents are in confrontation, suppositions against suppositions, convictions against convictions, interest in staying alive against interest in getting richer.
But the facts are the facts, and have to be prevailing on the ideologies and the fantasies, if only we take them in account.
I quote an article of The Guardian: “In the 18 years to 1996, Australia experienced 13 fatal mass shootings in which 104 victims were killed and at least another 52 were wounded. There have been no fatal mass shootings since that time. The 1996 reforms introduced in Australia came just months after a mass shooting known as the Port Arthur massacre, when Martin Bryant used two semi-automatic rifles to kill 35 people and wound 23 others in Port Arthur, Tasmania. The reforms had the support of all major political parties. Australia's gun laws STOPPED mass shootings and reduced homicides. Reforms still having positive effect 20 years on, as landmark study shows accelerated reduction in rates of suicide (65% less) and homicide deaths (50% less) caused by firearms. The lead author of the study, Professor Simon Chapman, said a similar study had been conducted 10 years ago, and that the researchers had repeated it to see if gun-related deaths were continuing to decline, finding that they had. “I’ve calculated that for every person in Australia shot in a massacre, 139 people are shot through firearm-related suicide or homicides, so they are much more common,” Chapman said. “We found that homicide and suicide firearms deaths had been falling before the reforms, but the rate of the fall accelerated for both of them after the reforms. We’ve shown that a major policy intervention designed to stop mass shootings has had an effect on other gun-related deaths as well.” He said the researchers had chosen to publish the results in an American medical journal not just because the title was a prestigious one, but also because the findings would have a greater impact. However, he does not believe the findings will have an impact on gun ownership laws in the US. “The US is a good example of where evidence is going to take longer to prevail over fear and ideology,” he said".
I share your hopes and your faith in the American youth tired of serving as target.
Love, hugs and bisous, my darlins Jean and Pat.

Anonymous said...

He might make sure his diet is good: cut out the junk food and make sure he is getting lots of veggies and good fruits, especially the ones that boost nitric oxide in the blood. Also make sure he is getting MODERATE exercise and not overdoing it or being a couch potato. Has he checked his blood sugar lately to rule out diabetes or pre-diabetes? I've hit a wall recently so I can empathize. Wishing you restoration and good health.

mistress maddie said...

I think he should try with just his friends first...maybe watching and sharing the moment will give that extra stimulation. A huge group at first might make for anxiety. If all else fails...off to the doctor.

Jean WM said...

Google it. Don’t laugh, usually there’s about 10,000 other people that asked the same question, I’m always amazed. May have to see the doctor, possibly to see his testosterone levels? Hugs and bisous.

Tex said...

As with most issues related to sex, the problem described could be mental, physical or both. The usual suspects for erection and ejaculation issues are stress/anxiety, being overweight, drinking too much, medication, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, heart disease, depression, etc. Since this is a recent development I recommend seeing your doctor.

Gabriel said...

I am not going through that problem, but I look forward to reading some suggestions as to ways to help that issue.

T said...

There would be many reasons why one wouldnt be able to ejaculate. Every now and then there will be times where it just doesnt happen but there are times when more attention should be sort by a doctor. At best nothing is wrong; at worst you have caught it early.

Many questions. Its not a simple one trick thing. Mental state would a big one. Anything going on upstairs can affect down stairs. Stress, anxiety, depression, frustration and many more.

Another big one is diet. In this day and age you really do need to pay more attention to what you are putting into your body. Food today can do us more harm than good and it comes from how its grown. Chemicals used in fertilizers, pesticides and growth hormones do have an effect on the human body.

Pay attention to the types of foods in your diet. Organic/processed food ratio is a start. If processed foods dominates your diet that will be causing your body some problems. The longer it goes un-addressed the worse it will get over time. Over time our bodies ability to process the crap we put in diminishes. Heavily processed foods can speed that decline.

On the physical side; is there pre-cum? If there is none then there is potential something is happening within the digestive system and it can lead back to your diet. Pre-cum is needed for an ejaculation; it gets the penis ready. Without it, ejaculation may be painful or may not happen.

Circumcised? If so you can lose sensitivity over time. Even if uncut sensitivity loss can happen.

The penis is a muscle. Treat it as such. Muscles build resistance to repetition over time. The penis is no different. Kegel exercises are good for keeping the prostate gland healthy and will keep the penis in a healthy condition. When jerking off your arm is not the only muscle that is being used. Penis, prostate, ass, lower abdomen, back etc.

Urine color. Mostly clear; all good. Yellow; chemical imbalance (your body is working on it). Orange; see a doctor. Red; straight to emergency.

There are lots of reasons. Those are just a few. Most important one would be see a doctor.

In meantime; try a glass of room temperature water with fresh lime juice before bed (from an actual lime; wash it, cut it, squeeze it and drink it). Limes work well with your digestive system in assisting its functions. The need to pee/poop in the morning will be stronger than normal especially if its your first time trying limes.

Anonymous said...

Retrograde ejaculation still provide relief.

I'd say try a circle jerk. It might help, and if it doesn't, you're no worse off.

@French Patrick: Interestingly enough, the first gun control bills were about race. (Though I must question why being shot is worse than any other death. Total death till is what we're trying to bring down, I thought.)

But wait until you see them get creative. Thirty states have proposed laws making deliberately running people over with cars legal for racist reasons. And racists have long been about being creative, at least in western states. (And be creative I mean sadistic.)