Tuesday, August 19, 2014

(Comedian's) Cock Riff

1
Have you ever seen one of Louis C.K.'s comedy routines? I stumbled upon one last night as I was channel surfing. I've never been much of a fan, but this time he happened to be in the middle of a riff on sucking dick and masturbation. Well, needless to say, I had to stay tuned.
2
He said he'd never seen a cock that he liked enough to suck - unless it was Ewan MacGregor, then he wouldn't hesitate, he'd be all over it.
A
Made me wonder when he'd seen Ewan's dick.
3
Maybe it was in a gym somewhere and he got a peek under the towel.
4
In his bit about jacking off, he said "At first I used two fingers and my thumb - because no one teaches you how to jerk off. Then I saw a guy using his whole hand, and I thought, wow! brilliant! ..." (I'm paraphrasing, of course.)
5

6
He had a friend he jacked off with - the guy liked to sandwich his cock between hard surfaces and had Louis sit on his ass to increase the pressure. Louis had the forethought to at least announce to the audience not to do that; "Too much pressure can damage your cock. Really." Bravo! man, bravo!
7

8
Then he talked about getting older and jacking off versus hand jobs from his girlfriends and wife. No comparison. Yep. His wife didn't want to have sex, didn't want to suck his cock, and offered him a hand job. He said, in order to cum he had to wrap his hand over hers. Typical. Sorry, ladies, but you know it's true. Despite what porn may portray, you have no real interest in jacking us off - and it shows. And, I wonder if you have any interest in our cocks at all.
9

10 (Of course, I would have spelled Masturbation correctly)
Having a buddy to whack willies with is so much more satisfying.
11

12

13

14

B


13 comments:

O!Daddie now at http:odaddie.tumblr.com/ said...

#10 equally applies to M/M relations - trust me on this!!

Your French Patrick said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Your French Patrick said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LORD PATRICK said...

Wonderful images as always! And, of course, great advice! Trust all goes well for you. Hugs, Patrick

Anonymous said...

ANYONE can catch multiple glimpses of Ewan Macgregor's cock in the movie "The Pillow Book". It's quite impressive. I'm with Louis CK on this one.

Rick Jeans said...

I enjoyed the pictures today! Thank you

Anonymous said...

Scott said...

Awesome pics... I agree totally, guys just know so much better about how to get our nut off..via ourselfs or jacking with a bud:)

Thanks

Your French Patrick said...

Photo N°10: I have often seen "masturbate" be written "masterbate" and I searched why.

It comes from "Charlie Bate" who is a character in Oliver Twist of whom Dickens thought it would be funny to call him Master because it sounds like masturbate.

Have a wondrous day my dear friend and as many bisous as needed to cover all your body with saliva, including your soft balls worldwide known by everyone and your mother.

SickoRicko said...

I love hand jobs!

Anonymous said...

Agreed, women are strange! They may *tell* you how much they love you, but (especially after menopause) don't wanna express that love by offering you a screaming orgasm. You gotta bug em, then the best you're likely to get is a handjob.

Gotta see the humor in this! I smirk when I see a young starry-eyed guy getting married, cuz he has NO idea of what is (not) cuming in a few years. And my favorite joke remains:

Q. What is foreplay for the healthy/fit older male?
A. 20 minutes of begging and pleading!

-Eddie

Anonymous said...

@Your French Patrick: remember the National Forensic League, from high school? Yeah, those people (who like to debate about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin). The most successful members of our debate crew were referred to as (drum roll here) "Master Debaters".
-Eddie

whkattk said...

@ Eddie - That's pretty funny - and I'll bet the guys had plenty of fun with that!

whkattk said...

@ Eddie - BTW - I'd never heard that joke. It's sadly true. Truth in comedy...