Had planned on a lovely finish to Masturbation Month
"Sorry to bug you again. But I face a real dilemma that I hope you can help me with because I really need some advice on this one. Things have gone so good with having my older son living with me. But now he wants to invite his friends over - the ones his mother found him jacking with. I seriously don't have a problem with it because I've read your blog long enough to know it's no big deal if they get a group session going again. And he admits it's very likely.
But here's my issue. I don't know if I should be in the house. They can be as naked as they want, they can jack off as much as they want. I'm afraid of what I might be accused of if details leak out that I was in the house. In case I never mentioned it, he is 16 and that's certainly old enough to be home alone but at the same time I'm afraid to leave them without some kind of supervision. I could hide out in my bedroom and read or watch TV I guess. But I hate being cooped up like that in my own house.
Any suggestions would really be appreciated."
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First off, he's not bugging me at all - it's why I do this.
But, what to do...
But, what to do...
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What to do...
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Rather than having to hide out in his room alone
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I suggested he leave the house if he trusts his son to be level-headed - to keep his friends from making a mess, to not allow drugs or liquor,
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Hopefully, dad would have somewhere to go hang out for the evening; friends he can visit.
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He needs lay down the law first,
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and stay long enough meet his son's friends before he leaves.
So, my Faithful Readers, what do you think?
Should he stay? Or should he go?
17 comments:
I tend to agree... set down the law (which might even include, if they do get naked they do it in his bedroom, or in the basement living room, or someplace that is not easily seen by the dad.) meet everyone, and leave for a prescribed amount of time. Tell them, "I'm headed out to eat. I'll be back at X:00." Then be back when you say. They have their alone time, and then you don't feel trapped.
I know when my brother's and I were alone when we were kids, we would wait until parents went out to eat dinner with their friends.
Goodluck.
Even though there is nothing wrong going on, my friend who is a lawyer would say nothing should go on as long as any kind of case is going on. Don't tempt fate and give the ex absolutely any ammunition. If the case is closed then if I were him, stay to meet the friends and go out with hid own friends for the night. But if this case isn't closed, which I don't know if it is with the youngest son......don't tango with trouble just yet. She sounds psycho enough already.
I feel that if any one particular parent of one his friends got wind the guys were up to, the parent might want to be a jerk and make a stink about it. That could get back to the mother of the son and she could start another of her hissy fits. I think the dad here should stick around even if he feels bored or maybe jack off in his room or something. None of these guys appear to be 18 or older. Could be a problem if they are left alone.
Only he knows if his son is reasonable enough and if he is capable of containing his own overflowing and those of his friends.
Your advices are wise, but as for me I would stay by ensuring that I don't bother them. For example, by not leaving my office or my bedroom so as to be within reach if my son needs me or if I have good reasons to think that the things are going too far (that is beyond the limits negotiated with my son).
I wish you a wondrous day, mon chéri, with lots of bisous.
I would stay in my room. Don't come out unless you think you REALLY have too. Trust is fine. But the kid is 16. Remember when you were 16? Lay down the law to them, then retreat to your room
Well... if the son is of legal age in his state then there should be no problem. But just so the son or his friend don't get weird about being naked together..I think you are right. Dad should meet them first and then leave..also he should remind his Son about the use of condoms if they are going to do anything anal.
Oh..... thank for the wonderful comment on my blog this afternoon... you are so good!
Thanks for your email! Big decision, but I will probably continue for the present! I'm not sure about the man and his son. Certainly get to know the guys his son is bringing into the home. Set a time limit! Certainly no drugs or liquor! If he stays in the house, under no circumstance join the group.
I think he's right to not be participating or observing his son's friends masturbating. If he stays around he should be able to say to someone who asked that he didn't know what was happening and that the kids weren't loud or unruly. If it's only a couple of friends they would naturally be in the son's room, or basement playroom or they like and he could continue to inhabit the house if that's what he wants to do. If it were a nice day I might work in the garden or read a book in a hammock - out of sight of the kid's activity. If it were a big party things could get out of hand (especially without the calming effects of masturbation) and he should apply the same standards of behavior.
My own experiences with group JO is that it's much less likely to be hot than 1 on 1 unless it is carefully orchestrated so everyone is participating, which takes some effort to get the participants comfortable with each other. When I was hosting group erotic massage sessions things were a lot more intense with 3 to 6 men than with a dozen or more. Not exactly the same thing but there was a lot of mutual masturbation.
With a group, it's always best to have rules about physical and emotional safety - only using hands, no mouths, no touching the anus, for example. (Perhaps the hottest group masturbation ritual I've participated in had equal numbers of men and women, occurred several days into a Body Electric workshop, and had a only-touch-yourself rule.) It would be good to clue in the son to this, although it could be awkward for him to initiate such a discussion with his buds. Maybe after everyone is finishing coming to ask how it worked for each person. My group massage sessions always had a closing circle for this purpose.
This is probably way more than Dad wants to hear, and untold generations have had JO circles without careful preparation!
You gave very good advice!
Age of consent notwithstanding the best advise is go out after meeting the friends and laying down the law. If his ex is anything like mine then it's his only choice.
Go! And tell his son what he expects of him and his friends, and then tell son when he will be back.
This gives son a chance to earn more trust. Father should meet the boys when they arrive and make sure they understand what is expected from him so son doesn't have to.
I also think fathers should tell their sons more often that they love them. Mothers do this out of habit but fathers find it difficult to express their feelings. This way if bad things happen, anger isn't the only feeling he gets from his father.
Hey, so I've been reading this post and found it very interesting and have learned somethings. But to the dad with the delima, from a dad to a dad lay down the rules and set a time meaning, at this time you will come home. Let him know just like you have that you respect and trust him enough. But that he also understands there are rules to follow and that when you walk through those doors everything, what ever it may be ends. Remember you are the dad and you have valid concerns about being present. In this day and age, who knows what can happen. So, be the dad that you are and just tell him the rules and that he has to adhere to them and respect them. After all we were boys once and we had rules. So no worries dad, go and leave him with his friends and go and enjoy a dads night out and know that when you walk through your door that all is well and good to go.
Hope this helps..
H
can they go in another place/house?
wouldn't they feel themselves embarassed for a wank-session knowing his dad is in house?
As encouraging as Dad would like to be and let his son be open about all these things I would suggest some caution with this one. The situation with the ex-wife is still very fresh and I wouldn't do anything that might cause further trouble. What if she's watching your every move? This one could come back to bite you. I would suggest he has a talk with his son and just have him cool his jets for a while. Stay home with your son and his friends for a handful of visits. Get to know them before you let them loose.
@ Stan-Rhode Island - good to hear from you again!
La foto nueve, me recuerda una fiesta de verano entre amigos. A media tarde ya estabamos bien colocados, sobre todo yo que era el más joven y no tenia mucha costumbre de beber. Mi amigo y compañero de habitación me aconsejó que subiera a descansar un rato, para poder disfrutar a la noche de la barbacoa. A última hora de la tarde subió a buscarme. No sé, dsà por la bebida o por la situación en que me encontró. Estaba profundamente dormido desnudo boca abajo, se acercó y acarició mis nalgas, yo desperté y girando la cabeza le sonreÃ. Aquella sonrisa delató mis deseos, marchó al baño y al momento volvió con un tubo de crema. Se huntó el cipote y después hidrató mi ano. Se colocó de rodillas entre mis muslo y clavó su verga hasta el fondo. Era la primera vez que tenia una relación con mi amigo es más él tenia novia y era hetero. Pero la bebida y la situación habian obrado el milagro.
Anon (rough translation) - Photo nine reminds me of a summer party among friends. By midafternoon we were already well placed , especially I was younger and did not have much habit of drinking . My friend and roommate advised me to come to rest for a while , to enjoy the BBQ night . Late in the afternoon he went for me. I do not know , DSI for the drink or the situation in which he found me . Was fast asleep naked face down , approached and caressed my buttocks , I woke up and turning my head I smiled . That smile betrayed my wishes, went to the bathroom and when returned with a tube of cream . huntó the cipote is hydrated and then my anus . He stood on his knees between my thighs and stuck his cock to the bottom. It was the first time he had a relationship with my friend I am he had a girlfriend and was straight . But the drink and the situation had worked the miracle .
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