Morning
"I have an interesting situation with my son. He's been on the swim team for three years and this year for the first time ever there is a female coach. The issue is that she goes into the locker room when the guys are naked. He says she doesn't do anything weird but it makes most of them uncomfortable - especially if anyone chubs in the showers. He asked what to do about it. A talk with the head coach hasn't helped. He thinks they should deal with it the way pro athletes have to. They all like her well enough and don't want to stir up any shit because she's a really good coach. Ideas?"
It's true that the idea of women in pro team locker rooms is fairly common now. But, again, they're pro players.
If they don't want to cause a big ruckus: Does the team have a "manager" - you know, the guy who doesn't compete but helps out making sure everyone is set and has what they need? If so, I'd post him outside the locker room. When that new coach approaches, he pops in and yells, "Towel up!"
28 comments:
You're right. If this would not be acceptable with a male coach walking in on young women, it is not acceptable with a female coach walking in on young men. I would speak with the head coach's boss - principal, dean, head teacher, etc. - or someone from the governing authority of whatever league or group the team is in. Point out the double standard here.
I would be very upset if my son was in such a situation - coach or not she should respect that these are young men, and stay out!
Yea! Tell her that they want access to the girl's locker room.
I am of a generation when female coaches stationed in the female locker room and male coaches stationed in the male locker room, especially in grade and high school.
This isn't some future age (like the shower scene in 'Starship Troopers' (...Casper Van Dien's very gratuitous butt shot... ) and locker rooms are unisex with men and women showering together. But we're nowhere near there in our society.
My thought is - THIS IS NOT THE PROS. If the shoe was on the other foot; if it were a male coach going into a girls locker room? How much outrage would there be about even a HINT of impropriety? She needs to... look at the bigger picture; this cannot be the ONLY coach in the school.
I may have missed this important fact if it was stated, but I would think the response also depends on the age of the son. If his son is in college, I can see where this might not be a big issue--although college players have a right to privacy and it is still questionable. If he is in high school, the female coach is well out of line and is being inappropriate. In my mind, it is a matter of how old the 'victim' (for lack of a better term) and needs a safe environment.
That sounds reasonable.
Toweling up is a solution.
Also, that coach may not be remotely interested in... men.
XOXO
I am surprised that a female coach going into the men's locker room should be okay. Is it okay for a male coach to go into the women's locker room? Even if that would be okay, I still think the feelings of teenagers going through puberty should be taken into account. You’re already so insecure about your body at that age.
A couple things hit me as I read this post. Regardless of whether these are high school aged males, or college age, why is an adult female accessing this space while she is completely aware they are nude? There is a question of consent regardless of the age. If the tables were turned and this was a male coaching a female team, we would not even have a question as to the inappropriate nature of this. Why would this woman even put herself in a position to have her intentions questioned? There have been many cases where charges have been brought against women teachers as abusers of male students. I am a nudist and all for the appropriate place for it where all have the ability to consent and they are given notice of the practice. That being said, I don't want to shower at my local gym what the female attendees of the gym.
Wow that is very unusual. Usually at that age they usually don't like the opposite sex in the same locker room. But if she's a lesbian she probably doesn't care, LOL. I remember being in high school I don't think a female in the locker room would have made me comfortable with either.
I got nuthin'.
Have they tried talking to her?
I'm sure there a male coaches for some of the female teams in this high school. What are the rules for them in the girls locker room? Shouldn't they be the same with this female coach.
Two points they are not paid to play, they 're only kids. Second point; Would the administration feel the same with a male coach walking into a girl's locker room when they are naked. There would be yelling to high heaven. They would call it sexual harassment. This is a legitimate complaint that needs to be delt with by the school board if the coaches are not listening.
It's not only women in the locker room-- your last photo has a guy in a green jacket getting a good look at one of the guys...
Isn’t the expectation for privacy the same for male and female athletes? So why isn’t this a school policy? I suspect there is more to the story. Looks like Virginia has a new governor! Hugs and bisous.
It’s disappointing that the head coach doesn’t take the lead on this. You can bet if it was a male coach going into the girls’ showers, any male or female head coach would have a word with the offending junior coach.
Even if most of the young men were comfortable with it, as long as some were, the female coach should be more sensitive.
What does she need to go in there for anyway? Is there a legitimate reason that she needs to intrude at that point? If so, then posting the manager as lookout might be the solution.
My father was HS coach and felt uncomfortable showering with the boys. When I was 10, two days per week I used to go to his school and joining him in the locker room and I saw some semi guys. That's life in the male locker room he used to say. Today they use single stall, no need to showing out to the coach. In these case, I'd wear a towel changing clothes after the shower.
How would the establishment respond if the genders were reversed? That's all you need to know along with pushing non-discrimination principles, privacy and consent.
A coach is just a coach, they shouldn't have any real power, and there's no compelling reason for a coach to have to enter the locker room area, so I think the players need to take the matter to a higher authority.
I don't agree that the players should have to towel-up just so a woman can invade their privacy and perve on them.
i would think equal rights will fix the problem...men teachers can go in the girls lockers
a male coach would definately not be allowed in the girls shower - should be the same here
This is 100% inappropriate behavior. What if the rolls were reversed and a male coach was entering the girls locker room? There would be outrage! These are children (minors) and an adult female coach has no business going into the locker room. The parents need to meet with the Principal and demand it stops, and if they don’t get satisfaction go to the elected School Board. Not wanting to upset the coach is BS. There are plenty of good coaches so let her walk.
Just as the women's locker room is no place for men, the men's locker room is no place for women. Period.
There indeed may be more to the story, but everyone here seems to be on the same page: A talk with the Dean or Principal.
VA did it up right! Gov, Lt. Gov, Atty Gen., and 21 Delegates!
Hugs and bisous!!!
What a great response. Thank you!
I do believe we're all on the same page: She needs to stay out of the men's locker room when the team is not dressed.
Alternatively, she gets to strip off too if she is to enter the mens locker room.
Sidebar question: The first photo, the dream stud covered in cum... is that Lucas Cage ("White Lotus")?
No, I don't think so....
I mean, when I was in high school, our showers were horseshoe-shaped, so if guys were uncomfortable, they could just pick the shower deeper in the shower room.
But of course, our coach was a man.
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