Info Here Is Amazing

Remember the guy who wrote in because his wife had gone "bat shit crazy" over her sons jacking off with a few buddies? Imagine my delight to find this email waiting for me this morning. It's fairly long, but worth the read.

"Seeing today's post reminded me I still owed you a response. But that dad - I feel his pain - though my two sons walked in on me at a much younger age. I thought I had them occupied watching Finding Nemo when they walked into the bedroom to find me spread eagle and pounding my pud. When they asked what I was doing, well I didn't know what what to say. They were both too young to understand masturbation so I just told them "Daddy's stones hurt and he's trying to make them feel better." They both said "Oh." The younger said, "We're hungry." The older said, "Yeah, can we have some cereal?" LOL.

Anyway, part of the reason it has taken so long is that I didn't want to tell you until it was all over. I didn't want to risk my ex finding out about the blog, or especially that I'd led both of the boys to it. I stopped the older one from leaving any more comments. I told him it jeopardized the blog. I mean what if someone noticed and they reported you. That would be awful!

This was quite a mess. My wife reported us to CPS. They showed up and tried to haul my son out of my place. He refused to go. He actually locked himself in the bathroom and threatened to run away. They left, but we got notice the next day he had to show up in family court because legally he should be with his mother.

I called my lawyer and we went. I thought we were in deep shit when it turned out to be a female judge. I even whispered to my lawyer that we needed to ask for a man. He told me to keep my mouth shut and let him handle it. When the judge asked my son why he wasn't where he belonged, he looked over at his mother and just blurted it out. "She caught me jacking off and threw me out." After the judge admonished him for the language, she decided a new custody hearing was in order and scheduled it for several weeks later. In the meantime he stayed where he was.

Oh, my ex was pissed! I didn't help things when I told the judge she had refused to allow me to see my younger son. I couldn't believe how cool this judge was. She pointed a finger at my ex and told her flat out she was breaking the terms of the agreement. And then added my younger one to the custody case. I though my ex's head was going to explode! I kind of wish it had.

I forgot what it was like to have a kid in the house all the time. We adjusted but it was a long five weeks. We sure had a lot of discussions based on your blog. I mean A LOT!  I think he's read through more than half the posts already. And hearing my son say "cock" and "cum" took some getting used to. Guess it's tough sometimes to realize your kids are growing up.

Anyway, the judge decided my oldest was old enough to make the decision for himself. The psychologist on hand was a brilliant suggestion. So thanks for that! The younger stays with his mother. He's not very happy about it, but that's the way it is. My lawyer says we can file a petition in a year or so and that seemed to satisfy him. At least he;'s got something to look forward to.

In the meantime, neither one seems afraid to ask me anything. I've gotten to the point where I'm very comfortable talking to both of them about their bodies and sex. So maybe the whole mess was a good thing. Look for the silver lining, right?

Thank your readers for me for their support. Your blog is the best. I hope it's around for a long time. the only thing that I find disappointing is that more straight men don't comment. I mean, I get it that most of the pictures aren't exactly what gets them off, but the info here is amazing. I've learned more in one place here than from a dozen so-called straight internet sites. So believe me, I'll keep reading if you keep posting.Thanks again."

Well, even a partial win is worth celebrating. Keep your younger son in the loop and things should be fine.

Enjoy the weekend. Get naked and celebrate Masturbation Month.

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Because things are about to come to a close on the month-long celebration, I shall schedule posts over the weekend.

I hope you enjoy them.

So Why Not?

"My son came home from school and caught me laying on the couch watching porn on my laptop and stroking the stick right at the peak. I had nothing to cover up with except my hands and wasn't able to stop my ejaculation. I fumbled around like an idiot embarrassed as hell. He grabbed a handful of paper towels and handed them to me and he was laughing the whole time. I still can't look him in the eye and now I can't believe how guilty I feel about the whole thing. What do I do to get over this?"

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Well, now... I'd say it's typically that mom or dad are the ones "catching the kid in action" and have to deal with smoothing things over.

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But, it does happen this way sometimes. There's nothing to feel guilty about. Really.

I'd suggest you take the first opportunity to have a talk with him. But you must make light of the situation. Because, chances are he's known for a long, long time that his old man jacks off. And, apparently it didn't bother him to see you with your cock in your hand; certainly not if he brought you the towels so you could clean up. Hell, you can even laugh about it. That's the best way to let him know, to get him to understand, that no matter how old we are and regardless of our relationship status, men jack off. It's pretty plain and simple.

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 Plus, what better time of year could this happen than Masturbation Month? It's a great opportunity to let him in on all the reasons we do. Yes, first and foremost is likely to be that we're horny, but tell him about the other myriad reasons. But, truly, just because it feels good, we enjoy it, so why not?

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I think it's great that he didn't make a big deal about it. Now it's your turn to make it something normal and common. In fact it's so common there are multi-millions of guys stroking away right at this moment.

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 Hell, some of them acknowledge it's so common, they're stroking together.

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What We've Got

Rejoice straight dudes! 20% of all women don't care about the size of your cock.

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Our mates across the pond have it the best when it comes to cock size. No, not because they're blessed with endowment. The ladies there have the most realistic expectations of all the women in the world. Brits are realistic...Poles, not so much, which can lead to disappointment when the package is unwrapped.

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The difference between gender perception of "normal" or "average" length is pretty close. Men believe the average to be 5.6"; women believe it's 5.4".

When guys were asked what the "ideal" size would be? 6.5" Women, 6.2". The online sexual health site DrEd did the polling for these numbers, culled together in a wonderful article in the Daily Mail (brought to us by Faithful Reader, Jean). [Click the link to browse the entire article, with graphs galore!] It's amazing how close we are, isn't it?

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But why the disparity between reality and ideal? Faithful Reader and fellow Blogger, Lord Patrick, has postulated that it's possible that gay art may have something to do with this. That then the larger depictions spilled over into the straight community. He may have a point.

Tom of Finland was very popular in his day; probably the most prominent.

Could "size matters; bigger is better" have flowed into the hetero male mind? Maybe.

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Many straight dudes would patronize bathhouses because wives or girlfriends wouldn't agree to blow jobs (my first wife certainly wouldn't),

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or allow their man to kick back and enjoy a hand job (she wouldn't do this either).

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Enter the gay clubs...where they would observe which men got the all the attention.

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We still love looking at guys with larger cocks. The adult industry knows it, and perpetuates this. Flaccid is typically not shown - there is always tumescence; those semi-hard-on's.

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Boners - well, the proper camera angle can make a cock seem larger than is actually is

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as revealed in this final shot

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But, cheer up, men! In our hearts, and in the hearts of our spouses and partners, we know the reality.

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And, in general, we're quite happy with what we've got, and we love our cocks.